Safety first
Dating safety tips
Most first dates are just first dates. A little planning means you can relax and enjoy it, and leave whenever you want to.
Look him up first
Search his name and photos before you meet. With a Tea'd subscription you can also search his photo on Tea'd to see whether other women have posted about him. A short video call beforehand is a quick way to check he is who he says he is.
Meet somewhere public
Choose a busy café, restaurant or mall for the first few dates, and stay in public places until you know him better. Don't meet at his place or yours.
Tell a friend the plan
Let someone you trust know who you're meeting, where and when. Share your live location, agree on a time you'll text her, and pick a code word that means "call me with an excuse to leave".
Get there and home on your own terms
Arrange your own transport both ways, so you can leave whenever you like and he doesn't learn where you live. Keep enough money or M-Pesa aside for the ride home, and charge your phone before you go.
Keep your drink in sight
Order your own drinks, watch them being poured and don't leave them unattended. If you lose sight of your glass, leave it and order a fresh one. Know your limit so you stay clear-headed.
Keep personal details private
Hold back your home address, workplace and money matters until you really know him. Be wary of anyone who asks you for money, however good the story sounds.
Trust your gut
If something feels off, you can leave at any point, without explaining yourself. Your safety matters more than being polite.
Afterwards, spill it
Good date or bad, share what happened so the next woman knows what to expect. Stick to your own experience and leave out private details, as our community guidelines ask.
If you're in danger
Get somewhere safe and call for help. In Kenya, the emergency numbers are 999 and112. Kenya's national gender-based violence helpline is 1195.
Want to know who you're meeting?